Lee Ann's farewell - October 3, 2007

I've just finished tucking Abby into bed and feel a need to blog. Actually, I'm not sure yet if I'm going to post this, but writing is what I must do now.

Today is the one-year anniversary of Abby's accident. One year ago at this hour I think that Gordon and I were huddled in the hallway of ICU in Austin Children's Hospital while the neurosurgeon inserted a intra-cranial pressure monitor into Abby's skull. But we were not alone. We have never been alone. As we prayed and pleaded with God, the hallway outside ICU was full of friends from Hill Country Christian School, from Texas Parks and Wildlife, from Wimberley, even some friends we had never met before that night, also praying. And in a huge radius around Wimberley, Austin, New Braunfels, and beyond praying was taking place. And, despite our desperate fear, the healing had begun.

God heard. Even before we made that long drive with friends to the hospital and waited desperately to see Abby, He heard. He was in the people who rushed to the scene of the accident and provided care for the two girls. He was there with EMS on the ground and in the helicopter with the nurses. He sent people to find us so that we could briefly touch Abby before she was whisked away.

But there were still to be many frightening, uncertain days ahead of us. When Abby's sedation removal failed on day six and she had to be re-intubated, I fled away and shook my fist at God and told Him that I could not bear to have her not return to us. When her eyes opened, but it seemed she did not see us or comprehend us, we begged God that the healing would not stop. When her body awoke only to flail in frustration, our hearts broke. As she struggled with basic schoolwork in the first few months at home I cried. It was a very long road.

But God was with us. And you were with us. And that is why we wrote this blog--so that you could continue to walk beside us in prayer and so that others might find hope and comfort. Our faith is not faultless. We still do not understand why the healing we were granted is not granted to others who pray; all we know is that God is the source of hope and strength when there is none. We still sometimes mourn what Abby has lost , and we at times feel an envy for the wholeness that we see in her peers, but we also know that we have been granted a precious gift in Abby's sweet spirit. That gift is all the more priceless because we know how fragile it is. And, despite the moments of mourning, we have hope that the healing will continue and that God holds the future, even if it is different than the future we envisioned. We pray this blog conveys that hope.

And, so, on this anniversary, we begin a new chapter. I have struggled mightily with this decision (maybe because this blog has been good therapy for me...), but I think it is time for this blog to close and another to begin. I want this year to stand alone as a testimony of hope during a dark period, of learning to live day-by-day, of cumulative miracles that can carry one from the precipice of death to dreams of a bright future (did I mention that Abby finished her schoolwork early both yesterday and today?--Hallelujah!). And, then maybe one day Abby and I will come back and write a postscript that completes the whole story...

For now, thank you, thank you, thank you...for reading and praying. The kindnesses we received all along the way showed us the best parts in our fellow man, and we are honored beyond words that people have cared to continue to share our lives with us through this blog. If you're interested in the sundry daily activities of the Linam clan, feel free to check out www.linamramblings.blogspot.com. We'll keep posting some updates there, as I think our families have figured out it's the easiest way to keep up with us! It's been a privilege to share our lives and hearts with you over this year...

With love,
-the Linams

Thank you to--
*God, our source of hope, strength, and healing
*Beth Mitchell and the Schaedes for their love and prayers for us
*everyone who worked and prayed at the scene of the accident
*Wimberley EMS and Star Flight staff
*Austin Children's Hospital doctors, nurses, therapists, and social workers
*Ronald McDonald Houses in Austin and San Antonio--more than just a place to stay
*Doctors, therapists, nurses, and social workers at Warm Springs Rehab Hospital
*Little Tesoros home therapy staff
*Therapists at St. David's Rehab Hospital
*Teachers and special ed staff at Danforth Junior High in Wimberley, especially Mrs. Ruiz
*Teachers, coaches, classmates, and Pastor Tom Ray at Hill Country Christian School
*Dear friends at New Braunfels Church of the Nazarene for food, companionship, and prayers
*Wimberley 4-H, Hill Country Christian School, and all those who participated in the community fund-raiser
*Friends, co-workers, and Cypress Creek Church for the work on our home
*Supervisors at Texas Parks and Wildlife Department who gave us the time to heal together as a family
*Friends, family, pastors, and even strangers who visited, sent food, spent time with Frank, cared for our animals, called, emailed, donated money, and prayed; especially Abby's friends who have stayed by her side all the way